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Morning Mum, I have some questions...

Saturday, 19 September 2020

 

Good morning Mum


Dearest Mum, 

I am sitting here having my morning cup of coffee on the verandah. 

The neighborhood cockerels are cock-ka-doodle-doing,

The day is beginning,

the sunlight is inviting, 

and my self sabotaging mind is already at work. 

I have been dating this man for a while now, and I really want your opinion.

I want to know some more about you and Dad. 

I have some questions.

Am I subconsciously choosing the same ending?

Am I unknowingly taking the same steps you both made?

I am scared Mum. 

I want to hear your calm reassuring voice again.

I want you to impart your wisdom as I carelessly listen.

I want us to laugh over my silly thoughts, 'modern' perspectives and  shallow conclusions.

I want to take you out to my new fave restaurant and spoil you as you complain or rather 'comment' on  how recklessly I spend my money. 

I want you to nudge  me into the right direction,

and ease my anxieties about my decisions on this journey

But I  know if  your busy -body -self  was here,

 you would scold me  for wasting  this precious gift of a morning just wanting and wishing.

I must get up off of Dad's rocking chair and go about my day.

I must fulfill my purpose like you raised me too.

...

Always  missing, loving and praying for you,

Your only daughter.


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I am supposed to be a 'good' girl.....

Saturday, 5 September 2020


A good girl


I am supposed to be a 'good girl',

You know the type.

Reads her bible.

Goes to church every Sunday.

Keeps her legs 'closed'.

Washes the dishes, pots and pans till they sparkle.

Kneeds the dough for chapatis without  breaking a sweat.

Peels matooke with speed and preciseness.

Makes sure  her home-made Mandazis are a soft bubble of sweetness when they hit the tongue.

Cook  luwombo that makes men's mouth salivate before the dish reaches the dinner table.

Have marriage and children on her list of goals.

Pray for the husband she has never met. 

In the presence of elders only speak when spoken too,

never..almost never react to their misogynistic views with a tone.

You know that tone.

I am supposed to sit pretty,

learn how to kneel and greet with a submissive-friendly grace.

I must not take my career too seriously that it repels potential suitors. 

I must wait to be chosen,

and never wear blue nail polish 

because Maama Omuto says only prostitutes wear that colour.


Photo Credit: Unsplash 








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