Tuesday, 30 May 2017

I filled my life with all my favourite things....



Dear Reader

Some people are natural givers
We are sometimes called naive
That's just how we are in relationships
encouragers
motivators
confidants
safety nets
providers
secret keepers
helpers
shoulders to cry on
etc....etc....
We make ourselves available for the people we care about
We are loyal
And some people are just takers
they take your energy
your zeal
your time
Sometimes even your body
your ideas
your self-esteem
And if you  are NOT being careful
They walk out with your 'life'
And convince you that you'll never get it back again

So this happened to me many many many whiles ago
The usual story
I trusted someone and they let me down
bla bla bla
You know this story well
He just walked away
So I prayed to God 
I had all this space in my life that I had created for him
So God reminded me of one of my favourite songs
That song for Sound of Music 
When the thunderstorm comes
And all the Von Trap family children run to Maria's room
She sings them this lovely song about her favourite things
And soon they forget 
They dance around the room while the storm goes on 
So during my 'storm' i made a list of all my favourite things
And filled my life with them..
And it's been really good
It's been bliss actually

But now I am dating this new guy
I can see he's struggling
because I have no BIG space for him
I refuse to make my life about him
And he only knows how to create relationships where he can take
Where I tell him how to be better
Give away myself so that he can feel stronger 
So you see he hasn't learnt how to find all of THAT within himself
He still needs people outside of him, to do that for him
He doesn't know what his favourite things are
So he's hoping that I'll share mine with him
except I'm not willing to give him things to TAKE.
Because I am still getting to know him
I have designated a space for him
one where if he chooses to leave 
He leaves as he came 
without any of my favorite things..

Your Sincerely, 
Still Scared & All My Favorite Things 




2 comments:

  1. Wow. This is really deep. I read that last paragraph three times in order to take it all in fully.(while I listened to Sorry by Beyonce...lol)

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    Replies
    1. I am all about Sorry by Beyonce too....lol...I thank God for the lemonade album every month tehehehe...thanks for reading Kullein.

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