Dear God
Thank you for 2016!
Thank you for all the lessons learnt this
year.
In 2016 I made it a habit to start my prayers
with gratitude because I got tired of negative talk taking up too much time
and energy in our daily chats. I learnt about the power of my words. Thank you
for the battles you fought that I didn’t see, the fires you put out that I witnessed,
and the gifts you gave that were especially for me. This time you didn’t have
to spiritually pinch my ears because I wasn’t being too stubborn to listen.
Amen for periods of growth. Maybe that
is one of the greatest things about being human. We can change, we can grow
internally. We can become a better self.
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| Taken from Goodreads |
I made a vision board at the beginning of
this year! I put a lot of inspirational quotes and lists of things I wanted to
do. I didn’t achieve EVERYTHING maybe like 50% but it give me direction. I have
achieved quite a lot this year, even though it wasn’t on the vision board. I
consider those part of the gifts you gave me this year. I think I might be
moving towards organizing myself, my life, my present and my future… I am that
women that I always used to read about in books who’s taking charge of her
life! But I don’t want to say it out
loud in case I frighten myself right back into chaos and the scary unknown again.
As you know, I prayed a lot this year. Towards
the beginning of 2015, my Aunty brought a prayer warrior to the house just for me. At
first I was like ‘WHAT!?!’, but you can’t tell Ugandan aunties ‘No, Thank you.’,
especially when she thinks your life is spiraling, so I told this soldier of
God’s army all my ‘challenges’ and ‘my hopes’ for the future, as my aunty
sat behind her and nodded encouragingly at me. The prayer warrior rolled out
her mat, positioned her cross and bible, lit some candles and cried out to you
on my behalf. I must admit it’s kind of special having someone lament and pray
for you. I have to say I felt a little relived afterwards. When she was done
the prayer warrior gave me a list of psalms to commit to saying everyday. I
have stuck to it as best as can, I would give myself 80% pass rate this year
and 100% for effort made to communicate with you. Although, I did talk to
you every day, there were just some days I missed out on the serious ritual of
prayer. I kept a regular schedule of morning and evening prayers when possible,
there were also those random silent prayers at work and in the car on the way
home and don’t forget those quiet moments in the garden. those were helpful!
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| Taken from Goodreads |
Through prayer sessions, I practiced
forcing myself to let go. First I would pray to you. Then, I’d ask you for
help or an answer. Lastly, I would let go and wait. This is something
I need to take into all my relationships; to say what I have to say and not feel
responsible for someone’s response. God, you’ve
playfully thrown answers back at me in
some strange wonderful ways. From songs on the radio, to people bringing the answer into
random conversations, and books coming my way. I think you have also conveniently
used google as way to stalk your people and communicate with them. I know I have
seen it in action. You are an interesting one God…
In 2016 I took time to seize fruitful
opportunities, by meeting new people, attending events and continue with my
writing. I went to Sipi falls by myself here’s the blog post, I attended writing
workshops, again here are some of blog posts, I even met Doreen, the author of
Tropical Fish here’s the blog post. I
finished my Goodreads book challenge in fact I doubled it from 6 to 12 books. I
am back in the reading game! I met Sumayya Lee. Her book ‘The Story of Maya’ is
one of my favorite books this year. It was such a welcome surprise of a book,
nothing like I had expected. I also met Michelle Wrong and she signed my book! The Writivism festival was one of my favourite experiences
this year. I took my Aunty to the one woman play starring Maimouna Jallow, inspired by the book ‘Secret Life of Baba Segi’s Wives’; We could
not stop laughing. I watched a great play written by Aganza Kisaka called 'Black'. But the ultimate experience this year was the Writing Retreat.
Atleast every month I have blogged. In January, I collected stories from women around
me. Here they are. The project was inspired by me reaching the third decade in my life.
I felt I needed to define myself and take full control of the reigns. I am not
leaving my life to fate anymore. I shall create the life I want as best as can.
By the way I wore a bikini for the first time ever! YASSSSSSSS…girl. I shall keep buying more for future holidays, baecations and the upcoming honeymoon…
This was the year I almost owned an iphone,
but it was stolen…wamp….wamp…
As always I am grateful for friends and
family the amount of venting I have done on my life story this year, and the
amount of reassuring they have provided. Lord please continue to listen to
their prayers and bless them for their patience. Don’t forget to bless me for
my patience too! Cause there were days when I needed the strength to listen and
wisdom to handle them gently too!
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| Taken from Goodreads |
More symbolic of the journey I have taken
this year is the new dress I had made this month. One of my Aunties gave me some
fabric years ago and my unorganised self kept it stashed away. This year I finally
decided it must be turned into something! My Cousin sewed it together but
before she did, she took time to ask me what I wanted. I told her right down to
the last detail and she produced exactly what I asked for. I came home and found the delivery on my bed.
I feel like I was entering 2017 complete. I chose something for myself which
was good. This is big for me because it means I can trust myself again. I can
chose well for myself.
I think I am more confident in who I am. I
know what I would like do or achieve in this life, and I am comfortable with
what I am not and probably won’t achieve. This means that my prayers will not be wayward and confused, and as I have written so many
times on this blog in my letters to you, I shall go down the path you are revealing. I have
a post-it note by my desk with my personal development training goals for 2017.
All of them are connected to being creative or atleast exploring creativity.
Also let’s discuss this whole dating thing.
Now there’s an area that surely needs the revisit of the prayer warrior. You
are the God who moves mountains… you parted the red sea!!! Explain the possible
minuscule hiccup with my dating life then please !?! Surely you can ensure 2017
is full of good dates with possible husband material? I guess we will continue
this conversation in the new year...
So here’s to 2017!
Cause the Maria that is
showing up is really COOL! I like her. She’s not perfect but she’ll definitely do
for now. Where have you been hiding her? She shall be making
more appearances in the coming years that’s for sure!
And finally…..Lord,
I ask for wisdom, guidance, protection,
love, attention, presence and all that you think is necessary for me, my family
and my friends in 2017
My prayer is that you continue to work in
people’s lives, most especially when they call. I pray that you work in ways
that they can see and understand your presence, and that they can also enjoy growing in their relationship
with you as I have this year.
Lot’sa love
Maria XOXO
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| Here I come 2017! |
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