A word of advice. 

Please  don't take what I am about to say lightly, 

because this is real  gold and diamond encrusted wisdom that I am giving you for free. 

Here goes...

Read the next sentence carefully..

You NEVER fully recover from your first serious incident of burnout.

From that moment onwards you... yes you  are tainted. 

Tainted like the yellowish after effects of a bad liver infection.
I am talking about the kind of burnout that leaves you stuck in bed for days.
I am talking about the kind of burnout that leaves you  zombie-like
unable to enjoy a good book or your fave TV show .
I am talking about the type of burnout that induces vomit burning
deep at the back of your throat,
every time your phone pings with a new notification.

You are now polluted. 

You pushed yourself right off the edge and

 now you've got to learn how to live with this new body and mind of yours. 

Here's the thing though...

Life will do what it has always done.

Life will keep happening. 

Blessings will charmingly covort into your realm of reality 

Opportunities will shimmy in announced and unannounced

 but the impaired you is now cautious
Sometimes even suspicious of the universe's  timing.
Because just yesterday you were seated in hospital at 2 am,
worried,
deeply worried,
while you  were waiting  for your  Dad
 to complete his emergency treatment.

Ups and Downs come together and separately.
But now you have learnt something new about yourself
You cannot naively reach out to grab every good fortune or luck that comes your way.
You know the consequences of greed.

You know your limits.

You played the game for a while,
  and learnt you really don't need to have it all.  

Your mental boundaries are now a life vest . 

I mean what good is a gift if it will eventually drown you?

That's why I haven't been writing as much...

I am figuring out how to bloom

I am figuring out how to thrive 

I  have reached the 'much has been given' level
and I am learning the' wisdom' bit on the job

I walk around now asking God,  'How?"

"How do I manage this?"

"How do I leverage this?"

"How do I enjoy this?"

"How do I not forget this?"

"How do I live with this?"

"How do I take care of my self amongst all this?"

I am still gathering the answers 

And life is doing what God told it to do

Life is happening!

(Btw find me on Twitter @mariajulietrose )