I get stuck inside my head sometimes.
Keeping my problems, fears, anxieties and worries to myself.
I only share when the storm has passed.
This is going to change.
I have learned the wonderfulness of sharing and consulting
in confidants.
Confidants who are colleagues, friends and family.
I have learnt about the blissfulness of release of perfection,
and 'keeping it together',
of not carrying the load on my own.
This is going to change.
I have learned the wonderfulness of sharing and consulting
in confidants.
Confidants who are colleagues, friends and family.
I have learnt about the blissfulness of release of perfection,
and 'keeping it together',
of not carrying the load on my own.
I always used to worry what people would think of me,
if I showed them the mess & chaos that I am dealing with.
But the last few months,
sharing helped me grow,
sharing helped me learn,
sharing made me feel safe and loved,
sharing helped me rest,
sharing helped me learn I am not alone
and sharing helped me fix the mess.
if I showed them the mess & chaos that I am dealing with.
But the last few months,
sharing helped me grow,
sharing helped me learn,
sharing made me feel safe and loved,
sharing helped me rest,
sharing helped me learn I am not alone
and sharing helped me fix the mess.
So here's to me praying, speaking up, and sharing more.
I created a video. 😀😀😀
I created a whole 6 minute video
6.59 minutes to be exact.
My boss asked me too...
My boss asked me to help someone out!?!
Me!....Me!? Me with my mobile phone. 😃😃😃
I was surprised and frightened at first.
Yet the word "okay" slipped out my mouth,
and responded to her request before I could stop it.
Then reckless adrenaline induced panic set in,
making my mouth dry,
and pins and needles in my fingers and toes
for the rest of the morning.
Next day we started.
Me and the subject looked for a location.
Natural light is always best for mobile phone filming.
But we only had five hours...
If we filmed outside...
center of town traffic would have ruined our sound
So some bad lighting choices were made,
we found an empty conference room.
The blinds refused to open,
used the room lighting instead.
Sadly, it's the type of lighting that
strips the warmth out of black people's skin,
Leaving an unflattering grayish tint.
What could I do though?
I am still an amateur mobile storyteller,
who had a five hour deadline.
Set up the tripod
Framed my shot,
using the rule of threes.
Checked the sound.
And 1 hour later we had interview footage!
Then pushing the discouraging anxiety monsters aside,
I sat in my office corner,
and clocked in some serious hours on Kinemaster.
Many discussions later,
after several back and forths.
I reluctantly sent the email
with the final project attached.
She uploads it on to You Tube,
and Voila!
We are done.
It is out of my hands.
It is very far from perfect but I still love it.
I see ALL my limitations and mistakes.
But it's okay because I finished a whole project!
I didn't wait for inspiration.
I didn't wait for the call of the muse.
I just did it!!!
I have decided to make more videos.
I will also be drawing, writing and painting more.
Point is ....I will keep creating.
I am sorry my dear Muse,
I hope you'll forgive me.
But I have learnt from Ira Glass that consistency is important ,
So I am throwing our co-dependent relationship out the window.
Muse, you are part of the process,
but now you will no longer be the trigger.
And for you dear reader,
before you go venture off to other parts of the internet,
watch this video...
Also watch this one by Evelyn From the Internets too...
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